Getting Back to You: Establish Independence

There is a very important period in your life that is very easy to mess up: the beginning of adulthood. The majority of people move out of their parent’s houses when they are between the ages of 18-20. It is a very exciting time. You get to make your own rules. You get to do whatever you want.

Some may disagree, but I think it’s very important to establish your independence during this time period. Now I don’t mean don’t do what your parents say. Your parents usually have your best intentions in mind. Listen to them.

If I could go back in time, I wouldn't be giving you all of this advice! If I could be so lucky as to have you all learn two things from me they would be:
1) Don’t do what everybody else is doing because that’s what’s “cool”. I'll tell you what's really cool. Lots of money in your bank account. How does it get there? Hard work and dedication.
2) Don’t let a relationship control your life. If your significant other ever tells you they will break up with you if you do something, break up with them. Otherwise you'll probably end up coming back to read my posts about abuse.

Be you and be in control of your life. Don't even think about letting someone steal your pen.

{photo credit: www.quoteswave.com}

11 comments:

annikaphelps00June 21, 2015 at 9:07 PM
Great post. The key to life is finding "you". Not is a selfish way but in a way that's liberating to where the adversities of life are not troubling or depressing. Get through the hard times and revel in the good times. Life is what you make it.
UnknownJune 22, 2015 at 4:51 PM
True story. My Dad always joked about how smart he became when I turned 18 & moved out. Coincidence?? probably not lol
UnknownJune 22, 2015 at 7:54 PM
It's always so smart to do what you feel best rather than what your peers are doing. I have friends that like to go out and party but my closest friends and I tend to be the ones in the library at 2 am!
sparks--flyJune 23, 2015 at 8:44 PM
That is really good insight. I think young people need to learn to make choices by themselves, or learn to take advice and make good choice for themselves.
UnknownJune 24, 2015 at 8:42 AM
I agree that parents have the best intentions! I have found many times that I went to my parents for advice because they ended up having my best interest at heart!
UnknownJune 24, 2015 at 8:52 PM
I like the analogy of you writing your own story and knowing that you are in control of your own pen.
UnknownJune 24, 2015 at 9:00 PM
If you consider Erikson's Psychosocial Stages, 18 years is right at the end of the adolescence stage (12-18). This stage has the basic conflict of Identity vs. Role Confusion. This means that if social relationships develop properly, people will develop a sense of self and personal identity. Success leads to an ability to stay true to yourself, while failure leads to role confusion and a weak sense of self.

19 and 20 would fit under the stage of young adulthood (19 to 40 years) which is when the basic conflict of intimacy vs. isolation forms. Young adults need to form intimate, loving relationships with other people. Success leads to strong relationships, while failure results in loneliness and isolation.
Really finding a balance during these stages is key.
KBrowneJune 24, 2015 at 10:07 PM
Stephanie, I really like this post and I love the quote in the picture! It's so incredibly easy to get stuck in a reactive lifestyle when we really need to remember it's our own personal story and you need to decide who the players are and how big of a part they get in your show!